7/15

Andy knows and he is whining. He is realizing that we are probably not going to the cottage this summer. I feel bad for him but I just can't commit to going when the little one still won't poop on the potty. Even Andy is not 100% independent. I have to wipe his bum and he still has accidents. I do not want to drag all that through 3 days of driving.

I talked with Ryan last night. Telling him he had to stop messing his pants started today if we are to go up at all this summer. Two weeks of pooping in the potty then we can go up for 2 weeks. Not that I really want to go up at this point. New product is coming in and I still have lots of things to do around the house. But I will go up if he manages this next step.

And I will hook up the Wii. I know, it's been sitting here for almost a week, still in the box. But the boys don't ask and it's not all that easy to set up, no plug and play.

Furthermore, I have threatened Ryan that if he can't manage to poop in the potty by the time he turns 9, he will have to wash his own messy pants. He doesn't like that idea at all.

I wish I could get into his brain and understand.

Went to the mall to get a keyboard.

Andy finally broke through the plug so it wouldn't work. Yes, if I had the patience and the parts, I could probably fix it myself. It probably would have been much, much cheaper than going to the mall. We went to the Apple store. The keyboard was ONLY $29. They had iPhones in stock but I didn't get one. Barely even looked. I did notice that I couldn't see the screen with my sunglasses on. That kind of stinks.

But we couldn't just leavve the mall then. No, Ryan loves to follow the map and walk around. I asked them if they wanted to get their pics taken, they had a picnic set up at Sadies. Nope. Oh well. Saved me some money right? We walked past the Crocs kiosk and I asked Ryan if he wanted some. I do everytime and he says NO. I think it's funny. Then I said we should check EBX to see if they had a used copy of Sonic Heroes. Ours is too scratched to play. They didn't and Ryan complained and I said that was the problem with the older system because they don't make many new games for it. The salesman said he had a Wii in stock. Huh? How about it Ryan, do you want one? No. Huh? What a funny kid. Probably the only one in American who doesn't want a Wii. I deicded to get it because evently he would want it and then it would be impossible to find. As he was ringing me up, a woman came in asking for one. Whew! Oh and they are cheaper buying in the store since you aren't stuck with the bundle.

We kept walking. I asked if they wanted to go into Build a Bear which Ryan normally declines. This time he went in. Both boys got puppies and did the whole sound, heart, stuff, fluff, dress and name thing. Luckily, I had my small digital camera for a couple of pics. I was paying for the dogs and said it was an expensive day and realized I didn't have my Wii! I put it down to help Ryan with the computer. VERY luckily, it was where I had left it. We left then. No use testing what luck we had.

Family Traditions: Waffles

Every Sunday, I make waffles and sausage. This tradition has a several beginnings.

I always preferred waffles to pancakes. Christmas mornings, Dad would make waffles and sausage for John and his family. He had to have 2 waffle makers to keep up with the demand. He always used Aunt Jemima Original Pancak Mix.

When Gail moved in, weekends meant big breakfasts: eggs, hashbrowns, biscuits and bacon or sausage. Nancy bought me a Snoopy waffle iron one year. It really doesn't really make waffles, more like crispy pancakes. Michael bought us a waffle maker but it was belgium style. The Aunt Jemima wouldn't work so I switched to biscuick. That was better but I missed the original waffles. One year I finally found a regular waffle maker. Ahhh...

My dad would cook waffles and sausage on Saturdays or Sundays at the cottage. After my mom died, he started invited the whole "compound." He still uses 2 waffle makers.

I don't know when we started having waffles and sausage exclusively on Sundays. It probably happened after Gail died and I stopped making eggs since the boys don't eat them. I still use Aunt Jemima Original Pancake Mix. When my dad is here, I still have to mix the batter after one time his mistook flour for pancake mix and ruined the batch. But he takes over from there.

For sausage, dad gets Bob Evans. But we don't get it down here. I have tried several and the favorite is Johnsonville Maple Sugar Flavored. But now we can't find that so we are stuck with the original. It's still tasty but I find myself cutting back so Andy can have more. Actually, he only eats 2 links on Sundays. He saves the rest of Tuesdays and Thursdays when he has his biscuits. That habit was started by my dad at the cottage.

Ryan sometimes eats sausage but never warm waffles. He prefers to let them cool then eats them later. Andy eats his waffles first, still eats them in strips. Then he gets the sausage. His use of the fork is lacking. Andy would pick up the sausage with his hand, put it on the fork. Then take it off the fork and put it in his mouth. His hands got so greasy and he would just wipe them on his t-shirt. Today I helped his poke the sausage on his plate and put it in his mouth with out making his hands messy. I will have to remember to help him next week, lest he forget.

And he doesn't even like gummi bears!

Busy day for us. Pool, bank, lunch, gas, Target, chiropractor... Last time we were at Target, Ryan wandered away and we had to call code yellow. So I talked with him today and thought he understood NOT to wander away. I was wrong. Everytime I called out for him Andy got upset which made me get more uptight.We found Ryan in the candy aisle amongst a pile of gummi bears he had dropped on the floor. I did my best not to yell since that only makes things fall apart even faster. Once I got him to tell me that he did it, I grabbed a bag and made him pick them up. Do you know how much gummi bears are? $6.99 per pound. Ryan managed to drop a pound and half! And I felt I had to be honest. I told the cashier but he did not make us pay. He saved Ryan's hide.

Picky or stubborn?

The oven is not working. The stovetop is but not the oven. It's gas and if I knew how to light it I would. I have tried by sticking in a lit lighter (the long ones) into various hole in the oven and hoping it would light. Nothing. Though Bonnie laughed when she thought I was being very brave and picturing a whoom! where I would lose my eyebrows.Anyway, this is a problem. The boys eat chicken nuggets each night and they are baked. The package says they can be microwaved by I know this would be gross. I figure pan frying would be good as I just need to warm them up. Andy comes in and gives me the eye like I am playing with voodoo. He won't eat the chicken but Ryan does. This was Saturday. I had put off calling knowing that no one could come on the weekend and not thinking it was an emergency to pay the costs.I forgot about this morning. We have biscuits on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Yes, we are creatures of habit. I can't cook biscuits on the stove top nor in the microwave. So I pull out the bagels. Andy won't eat them even though he has no problem on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays & Saturdays.I called today and the repairman will be here tomorrow.

Did you do your chores?

He's too smart for his own good!The boys have daily tasks. Pick up a specific toy type and put them away. Do it 10 tens and earn a prize. I don't nag them and occasionally they do it.Then I had to do start a new rule, no movie unless you do your task for the day. Works for Andy. He doesn't even need to be reminded. He will come to me and tell me he pick up animals or put away games which is how he asks to watch a movie. Cool!But Ryan never asks to watch the movie. In fact, he will act upset when Andy turns it on and shuts the bedroom door so he can't hear. But soon, he has joined Andy and neglected his task for the day. For awhile, he was fascinated by iPhoto so that was his incentive. But I put photos on his computer so I could free up my own. So really, why do the task?This morning, I get dressed and come out of my bedroom to see Ryan by the garage door saying, "There are no more car keys." Huh? What are you doing? Turns out that he saw that Andy had earned another 10 points and was due a prize. Last time, I had the prizes in the car where they were safe from prying eyes. But since school is out and the boys are in the car 2-3 times a week, I moved them.What is interesting is that Andy didn't realize he had the points until Ryan told him about it. Then whined about not having enough points himself. Ryan has the list memorized. He knows which days he has to pick up trains, so on the other days, he plays with trains and leaves them until the next day he has to pick them up. And if he has to pick up potato parts today, he won't play with them today. Sneaky that one is.

Summer Vacation Day #2

The screaming has started, and it's not me. Ryan is following Andy around like little brothers are wont to do. But Andy is not the typical big brother. He doesn't understand it. He doesn't like it. And he whines and cries. Then gets Ryan upset to where Ryan screams like a banshee. My blood pressure goes up but I stay calm, at least on the outside. 12 weeks to go. sigh

But I did get another card done.

psycho killer jungle cats

Why does this title stick in my head today? It might be that Ryan has turned crazy ugly weird. It could be that he first grabbed (then asked) to use my new Brother P-touch Labeller and proceeded to copy a chapter of the bible onto strips of (rather expensive) stickers to put onto a sheet of white paper. It could be that when I saw what he did and said (quite loudly) OH My God! and Andy covered his ears so I calmed down and did NOT give Ryan the tongue lashing I felt he deserved. I tried to reason with him that it was too (friggin) expensive to print out a chapter that way. We could use the computer and make sticker strips. I even offered him the other tape which is black on clear. But he wanted the black on white which makes no sense (to me) since he is just putting it on white paper.

It could be that he loves to looks at guide books but doesn't want to travel anywhere. He also doesn't want anyone else to look at the books.

But I think it has more to do with the fact that Ryan is crazy. At least today he is. He doesn't want Andy to follow him. But he doesn't want Andy to be first either.

And I didn't mention that next Wednesday is the last day of school. Then we have 3 full months before they go back. What in sam hill am I supposed to do with them when they get bored during a 3 day weekend?

You understand?

Tell me. How do you understand how it is to raise kids with autism? You, a man. Do you have a kid with autism? Do you even HAVE kids? Are you a widower? DON'T tell me you understand until you have spent a a day in my birks. I'm not looking for pity or sympathy and I certainly don't need your patronizing attitude. Respect? That may be asking for too much but one can hope.

speaking their currency

When negotiating with kids, it's important to know their currency. WHAT will make them do something you want or make them STOP doing something you don't want? It's hard to know with my boys. Maybe with any kids. Seems like what works one week, will not work the next. You have to constantly renegotiate the terms. UGH!

Ryan was enthusiastic to do his chores/tasks for the points. Then he slacked off. I had to threaten no more scrapping. Then he goes over the edge and claims he will never scrap again, EVER!

Andy told me he DID his task so he could watch the movie. He didn't. I don't think he actually meant to lie but only said what he knew would work to get what he wanted.

It might be easier to do the cleaning myself but then again my back can't handle it and they wouldn't learn anything.