fifth grade pomp & circumstance

Andy's career with elementary school is officially over. Wednesday was his Moving Up Ceremony.

I got to the school very early and had a hard time finding a parking spot. I sat in my car a while listening to podcasts rather than sit in the cafeteria and wait.

When I was walking in, I saw A's mom. We chatted and made our way to the cafeteria. Before we got there, we were met by Andy's teacher who said we were to walk in with the kids. Never got that memo. We walked in in frint of the rest of the fifth graders. I was too focused on Andy to notice all those parents staring at us. We got to sit in the front row with our kids.

We got no programs like the rest of the parents so I didn't know how things were going to go. The Principal spoke then Wesley Chapel's Honorary Mayor spoke. I may have been having a caffiene overload because I couldn't concentrate for more than few words at a time. I took photos and gave my iPod to Andy to keep him busy. (As I was edited the photos, I realized most are crap. I am not good with indoor photography.)

They started giving out awards and I was happily surprised when Andy received a Citizenship Award. S won an achievement award. Then the completion certificates were given. Andy did great and knew where to stand.





After, there was a video of the fifth graders through the year. I don't know if they showed our kids as we were too close too the screen to see it well. Finally, the kids sang a song and we, the parents, were dismissed. We made our way to the car loop to wait for the kids to go through the clap out.



Our students were leading the pack. We went into the classroom where they had pizza & cake. Again, I wasn't told about this and Andy just wanted to leave with me. We did stay long enough for Andy to gobble a slice and drink some juice. Miss Lisa was there to say good-bye through tears. She has been with this kids since they started. It's a big change. These four have been together for 6 to 8 years.

I took photos of Andy with his teacher and the other support staff. They are all crap. This is only the only somewhat decent photo. This is Andy with Miss Angie. She has been the teacher's aide for the past 3 years. I had an interesting chat with her while we were waiting for the kids in the clap out.



We left and went to Chick Fil A for lunch.

fifth grade trip

Monday was the 5th grade trip to Busch Gardens. Andy did not go. It was a tough decision, one I struggled with. I hope I made the right choice.

There were several pros:
• Andy would have enjoyed it;
• All the other 5th graders in his class went;
• he would have been well chaperoned.

But too many cons:
• it's expensive, $50 plus money for food and souvenirs;
• I could not afford tickets for both of us;
• it's a long day, 10 am to 6 pm;
• Andy has strayed and gotten lost plenty of times in the past. I would not be able to relax until I knew he was safe at home.

One of the problems is that the teachers spoke to the kids before I made my decision. So Andy knew about the trip and thought he was going. I had to tell him no. It turned out OK because he didn't remember going to Busch Gardens years ago so he didn't know what he was missing.

But I still felt bad for him. So I said he could stay home and we would do things together. He happily agreed. He said he wanted to do things on Dale Mabry. We made our agenda: Hollies, Lake Park and Chick Fil A.

On a normal school day, Andy gets dressed and ready after 8 am. Monday, he was dressed by 7 am. He hovered and bounced and buzzed until I finally got ready myself. On the way to Hollies, he sang along with Raffi with his ear buds in his ears. He sang so loudly that I couldn't hear my own music. lol

We haven't been to Hollie's in years. They have really cleaned up the place. The plants always looked good before but now they looked great and just seemed like there was more order to the place. I expected Andy to wander off like he used to when he was little. But he stayed pretty close. They no longer have the chickens wandering about which is probably a good thing where Andy is concerned. When we went into the new antiques shop, we were met by their dog. Andy was ready to leave but the owner let the dog out instead.



There were so many plants I wanted to buy. But I stuck with a flat of jasmine groundcover and 4 bags of FloriMulch. FloriMulch is an alternative to Cypress mulch. I admit I was a fan of Cypress mulch until I learned than they cut down trees more for the mulch than use the leftovers. FloriMulch is made from the Melaleuca Tree. This tree was brought into Florida last century to help dry up the swamps. It is non-native and aggressive. I feel better using mulch from a tree that is a nuisance rather than the cypress which does so much to help the Florida environment.

OK off my soapbox.



Next we went to Lake Park. It's nice that Andy can do what he wants without Ryan telling him what to do. But then Ryan isn't there to interact with him. The little kids see Andy as a giant and don't know what to think about him. Andy was happy until someone brought their dog. Even though the dog was leashed Andy was not happy.



We met a young woman named Betty. She said that Andy reminded her of someone. She has done some teaching in Hillsborough county but Andy has never been a student there. "May I ask what his challenge is?" I was taken back by the question. It was such a nice way to ask that question. Her son has hearing loss but you really couldn't tell as he is bi-lingual. Betty trains horses and does some work with special needs kids. I have been wanting to get Andy involved (maybe Ryan too?) but the facilities are too far. This farm is actually not too far and the cost doesn't seem bad, $25/half hour session. We didn't get to talk too long because Andy was really unhappy about that dog. And it was lunch time.

Next on our list was Chick Fil A. It was crowded but that doesn't bother Andy. Especially since can listen to his iPod. After playing and eating some of his lunch, we were ready to go home and wait for Ryan. I don't think Andy missed the 5th grade trip. He is just a happy kid.

bringing gardening back

After the tree fell, I went looking for photos of its progress over the years. I was struck by how nice my yard used to look.

When we moved in, we had a bare lawn in back. Only grass and 3 shrubs around the a/c unit. I wanted beds but Gail didn't. He liked the plain lawn since it was easier to mow. He was OK with the trees since he wanted shade too. Then I convinced him we need more trees in the other corner. After he died, I kept adding more beds to each corner and eliminating the thirsty lawn. I tried different plants but many could not survive 2 boys and a dog. The indian hawthorne did well. So did the cassias which did so well they had to be removed.


(summer 2002. crape myrtles, jasmine planted on the fence, maple tree in front that later died, mint planted in the back to keep the aphids away)

I found that I like planning and planting but not the maintenance. And once I started scrapbooking, I didn't going out in the back yard much. Then I opened my online store and I really didn't have time to garden. What didn't die, grew like mad. I am embarrassed how my yard looks and want to bring it back.

(spring 2009. jasmine has taken over, I think the crape myrtles are still in there somewhere)



I have decided that since I can't go walking while the boys are on break, I can work in the yard. I started this week when Andy was home sick. And I did some more over the holiday weekend. It's funny but now I've got weeding on my mind, if I see weeds anywhere and am tempted to go pull them.

It's going to be a slow process. Already, I see weeds I missed after I thought I got them all. Or are they springing up overnight? Well, we seemed to be getting an ark full of rain.

he is NOT an animal

Andy got his first haircut at Carnival Cuts in Michigan. At the time, it was a novel approach, distract the kids with video so they won't realize a stranger is coming at them with a sharp object. Andy did fine and we went back several times.

Gail thought Andy should be able to go to the local barber and I tried. He just didn't like waiting his turn and the barber was not a hot chick with boobs. We would rather spend 40 minutes on the car, one way, for a 5 minute haircut that walk around the corner. Even in my younger days of motherhood, I chose to easy way out. That is, the easier way on my nerves.

When we moved to Florida, I could find no kiddie haircut places. I decided to try SuperCuts. I took Andy and Ryan one morning during the week when I expected it to be quiet. It was, no one was in there. I had to sit Andy on my lap and even then he was not cooperative. Finally, the stylist said he could only use the clippers since he was concerned about slicing Andy's ear off with the scissors. I agreed and he turned them on.

Andy did not like the clippers. He struggled even more. I held on for all my might. It seemed to take about 3 days but probably only took 10 minutes and Andy's head was shaved short. I was exhausted and embarrassed by Andy's behavior. Meanwhile, the other stylist assured me she would watch Ryan but she was too taken in with Andy's behavior and let Ryan crawl on the floor. Lovely.

I think the charge was $7 and I gave him a $20 tip. I felt awful. As we left, I heard the stylist say, "That kid is an animal."

Here is the part you expect me to march back in and ream the guy a new hole. I didn't. I was too shocked, humiliated and defeated. I cried the whole way home. Why did my son behave this way?

All this happened months before we had even a vague diagnosis of PDD-NOS.

Both Andy and I have come along way since that spring 9 years ago. He longer cries and fights his haircuts, though he does tend to shrink his head into his shoulders. And I would never allow anyway to get away with calling my son an animal.

8 weeks to optimum health

I have read several books on dieting and health. The only one that really makes sense to me is 8 Weeks to Optimum Health: A Proven Program for Taking Full Advantage of Your Body's Natural Healing Power by Andrew Weil. And I am learning that it really doesn't take all that long to bake a chicken breast or salmon fillet and some steamed vegetables. I have gotten into a routine of what I buy and what I eat. And I like routines.

Eight Weeks breaks down getting healthier into 8 weeks. duh. Dr. Weil explains his reasoning for choosing a Mediterranean diet then goes on to have you do a new step each week. They are all pretty easy to follow though I have gotten stuck at getting a massage, going in a steam room and meditating. The first 2 cost money and although there is no cost to meditating, I can't seem to shut off my brain.

The program then gets progressively more involved--more supplements; more of a shift toward a diet based on whole grains, fruits, and vegetables; more exercise. Besides these steady changes, each week's program has a focus: In week 2, you start drinking bottled or filtered water; week 3 focuses on organic produce; week 4, on sleep; week 5, using a steam bath or sauna; week 6, trying a "universal tonic" like ginseng; week 7, volunteering in your community; and finally, in week 8, figuring out how to integrate permanently the elements of the program into your life.

Another problem I have is getting all the supplements he suggests. You can order convenient packs from his site but it isn't cheap. Right now, I am just taking a multi-vitamin.

Oh right, this is Wednesday. Let's get the excuses out of the way. It has rained almost everyday so I have only been able to walk once. Add to that, Andy was home sick for three days and then there was the holiday weekend. My weight has been up and down more than any rollercoaster. I am quite surprised I lost anything at all. But lose I did. A whopping one pound! Hey, I am being positive. This brings my total weight lost to 43.8 pounds. And to prove it's been wet...

excuses, excuses!

OOPS! Where's today's post? It was on my to do list. I had plenty of time. The 3 day weekend just sort of slipped away.

I hate these long weekends. The kids get bored with each other and I get antsy to have them gone to school so I can do what I want to do. I was determined to make the most of this weekend by being productive. I would make cards, pull some orders, do laundry, do some weeding and write some blog posts ahead of time.

I did get some cards made.

I did some laundry.

I did some weeding.

But every time I sat in my chair, either Ryan was using the laptop or my eyes grew heavy and I was out. I hope I have gotten caught up in my sleep.

On Monday, we all wanted out of the house. So I suggested we go to Hollies. It's a family run nursery. Ryan was up for that (surprise) and we went. They we closed so we ended up at Lake Park. The boys had fun and I got lots of photos.



We were home in plenty of time for me to write something but then...

a tree grows [and falls] in florida

We moved into this house in January 2000. It was a new subdivision and had very few trees. In fact, the only trees were the small ones planted in the front yard of each home.

Our back yard faces southeast so it gets the sun all day. I knew I wanted and needed trees in the back. Our neighbor, Lisa, grew up in Florida. I asked her what kind of shade tree would be best, and grow fast. She suggested magnolias. I read some information and it suggested camphor trees. I called around to some nurseries and found that most were out of magnolias. Hollies had some smaller ones and we took a drive to look.

Hollies was a great find. The staff is so knowledgable and friendly. They had a lot of area where my boys could happily wander about. I asked about the magnolias and found that they were expensive, did not grow fast and were not good shade trees. The camphor trees? They were aggressive and not kind to the native Florida plants. They suggested elms. Elms? Aren't they all gone? These were a diiferent variety that did not succumb to the Dutch Elm disease. Also, the leaves were small and would disappear into the grass and not require raking. I had them install 2 and I had them placed about 15' apart so Gail could string his hammock in about 20 years.


(summer 2002)

I was good to the trees. Each day I watered them as directed. After a month, I began to wean them from their daily water. They didn't die but they didn't thrive either. When I planted the jasmine, I was told "The first year they sleep, the second year they creep ans the third year they leap." I think this may apply to the elms. They trees took a few years to sleep and establish their roots. Soon enough they did grow and provide some shade.

I wanted more trees. I picked up 2 red tip maple trees for $10 each. They were little more than sapplings. But they grew. I also spent a heafty sum on a ligustrum which is technically a shrub but can be trained as a tree like the one I got.

By 2003, the drought eased up a bit but there were some people who still watered everyday. My neighbor behind me was one. And his yard is a bit higher than mine because they goofed when they built his pool. I complained to the builder by writing a letter. I complained to the county about their watering habits. The county came out and fined me because I was watering on one of my off days. I had new plants and it is allowed. However, I would have to go to court to fight it and the appointed day was during our vacation. I paid the fine. Meanwhile, the neighbors constant watering killed one of my elms and one of maples. My symmetry was gone! The balance was off! grr


(summer 2004)

Hurricane Francis managed to tilt the remaining elm. My dad shored it up and it didn't seem to mind as it continued to grow.






(summer 2007)

My dad has to replace the support a couple of times as the elm outgrew them. Other elms in the neighborhood fell to the same fate. This past winter we had to remove the playhouse as the tree was leaning on it for support. Once again, my dad re-braced the tree.


(spring 2009)

Wednesday, May 13, we got our first storm of the year. It was earlier than our typical summer storms. And much stronger. The winds were fierce and the rain horizontal. The yard was flooded.

Thursday morning and the yard was still under water. Ryan went out to jump on the trampoline. I glanced up and saw the tree covering a third of the trampoline. I took some photos with my point & shoot, it being at hand. It was too wet for me to go out and check on the roots at the time. I did check later and the roots are still buried. Chris is going to come and check on it and decide the best action. (I told him it was a rush but it's been about 10 days.)





I hate that we have spent 9 years with this tree and we might will lose it.

movin' on up!

Andy is moving up to middle school next year. We visited WMS last week. It was nice to see a different building design. Let me explain. Almost all of the elementary schools are the same design. So even though the boys have been to 3 different schools, the only differences have been cosmetic. In fact, the design is rather utilitarian and ugly. Back to middle school. WMS was built in 1991 and it's a deep red brick. There are 6 buildings which feed off a central courtyard.

Andy was excited about his building having a hallway. The elementary school classrooms all open to exterior covered walkways. He liked that the hallway and bathroom have good echos.

His new classroom is rather small but there will only be 4 or 5 kids in his class. Four classmates are moving up but they will be separated according to ability. Andy & S will be in the highest level.



Andy's new teacher, Miss Jessica, is a trip. She looks and sounds a bit like Kristin Chenowith but is taller and doesn't sing soprano as far as I know. She loves these kids and they love her. While we were there, she was having the students help her pick out videos to include in their annual compilation. She tapes the kids "Cooking Show" and "Dance Party" and even at the school dances. Andy & S loved watching the videos.

There is an annual school talent show. One of the austistic kids won Third Place last year. Miss Jessica was so proud of him and showed his video. The boy, DK, was good but I know Andy can sing better. It will be interesting to see how Andy acts on the stage with an audience.

Classes start an hour earlier than elementary school. Which means the bus will come an hour earlier. Andy is not my early riser. We will need to work on this through the summer so it's not a shock when first day comes.



It was really interesting to see the older students. I did not know them before so I don't know what kind of progress they have made in WMS. But they spoke well and were not shy about meeting new people. I hope this helps Andy. One thing that will help is having Ryan at a different school. Though coordinating their schedules will be tough, Andy relies on Ryan being there. He hates when Ryan is sick and not on the bus.

[weigh-in wednesday] 5/19 diets

This week, .4 pounds, total 42.8 pounds.

So frustrating to watch the scale hover around the same point. I know I should weight myself every day. I can't help it. At least it isn't going up.

Should I even mention the word diet? It's a four letter word with a bad reputation.

diet 1 |di-it|

noun
the kinds of food that a person, animal, or community habitually eats : a vegetarian diet | a specialist in diet.
• a special course of food to which one restricts oneself, either to lose weight or for medical reasons : I'm going on a diet.
• [as adj. ] (of food or drink) with reduced fat or sugar content : diet soft drinks.
• figurative a regular occupation or series of activities in which one participates : a healthy diet of classical music.

verb ( dieted , dieting ) [ intrans. ]
restrict oneself to small amounts or special kinds of food in order to lose weight : it's difficult to diet.

I think I should focus on the first definition:

the kinds of food that a person, animal, or community habitually eats

OK. That seems pretty safe. Really, a diet is just what you eat. So, what kind of diet are you on? And I don't mean a specialized diet to help you lose weight. What kind of food to eat day to day?

Most of us born probably grew up eating the same things. Cold cereals for breakfast. Sandwiches on white bread for lunch. Meat, potatoes and canned vegetables to dinner. A few fresh fruits were thrown in but weren't encouraged because they disappeared too quickly. Store bought cookies and salty snacks were around but not like they are today. We jad milk in our cereal for breakfast, at lunch in school and were required to drink at least one glass during dinner. We were allowed one soda per day, usually a 10 ounce bottle. We had to split a 16 ounce bottle. Most meals were at home. With a family of 7, eating out became very expensive. TV dinners were rare and considered a treat. (Really, eating poor quality food in an aluminum tray was a treat?) I call this the American diet of the 1970s.

In the 1980s, more of our food came from packages. Packaged potatoes, sauces in jars and frozen, microwaveable meals became the norm. We still had milk in our cereal but in high school, we had the option of soda. Milk was no longer required at dinner. And that is partially because we started to eat out more frequently. My brothers were grown and gone and now we were a family of 4. There were more fast food restaurant and more affordable family restaurant to visit. There we were allowed one soda as free refills did not exist. Family meals at home were few and far between. When we were home, the TV was usually on and mom was probably on the phone. We were still limited to one soda per day at home. But we had our own money and local quickie marts to buy soda and snacks. This was our American diet of the 1980s.

I was never one for the cooking. Find something, make it and eat it. I don't enjoy the process, it feels like a chore. Convenience food were my friends and enemies. I learned to make casseroles since I would have to juggle to many things at once and try to coordinate all the cooking times and temps. I was cooking for convenience rather than health. And there are so many options in the frozen foods section. I love Stouffer's Mac & Cheese and couldn't happily eat it several days a week. I once made lasagna from scratch. It took hours and it didn't taste all that better than Stouffer's.

But convenience foods are not a healthy choice. They are full of added fat and sodium and preservatives. And they are not cheap either. You are paying for their time to make it and package it and deliver it to your store.

So what now?

warsaw filharmonia

The following week was spent getting acclimated to the city. Lori & Teré never seemed to stop complaining. It was cold in the rooms so Stefan and Fred brought over a heater for them. We went shopping for boots and they didn't like anything they saw. To be fair, we were shopping in Poland and were lucky to even find any boots. Many shops were half empty. Then again, did they not realize that February and most of March is still winter? Lori's pink high-top Reebok's may have been stylish but were impractical.

Mike and I did our best to avoid them. I liked Nopp but she stayed with Lori & Teré so I only spent time with her at class or at the dorm. Fred didn't do much to make the girls shut up but he didn't placate them either. I think he was used to tuning out females.

I started to venture out on my own. I liked doing what I want when I want and not have 5 people complain about it. I liked to ride the trams and just watch the city go by. It was very cheap, less than pennies. I went into a local café called the Magnolia. I was handed a typed menu, all in Polish. I would point to something and be told "Nie wiecej" I would point to something else and be told, "Nie wiecej." Finally, I pointed to something that they did have. I didn't know what it was until it came. It turned out to be veal cutlet which was good.

I thought a lot about Bill. As much as I liked him, I was conflicted. There wasn't anyone to talk and I didn't know which way to go. I guess that was all for the best. Lori told Fred about him. When we got to the embassy Friday night, Fred was already there asking for Bill. It was very embarrassing. It was the one night Bill & I could have gotten together. But there were plans to go to the Warsaw Philharmonic. I really did not want to go and Fred knew it.I am glad that I went. The music, limited to a piano and violin, was wonderful. I was really impressed with the architecture. The original building was destroyed in 1939 and was rebuilt after the war. Fred thought it looked too plain but I really liked it. I think it made me focus on the music more.And going to the Philharmonic made me avoid a big mistake with Bill.