now what?

I read a comic which asked the question, "What would you want to do if money were not an issue?" It is a great question. And I wish I was asked this before I made any career choices.

I want to make art. 

What kind of art? I like photography and graphic design and lettering.

I have always liked art and drawing. When I was younger and thinking of careers, I knew art would be a struggle to make a living. I thought architecture would be a good compromise. 

I was wrong. Very few architects get to make anything resembling art. Architects are problem solvers. I am good at problem solver. Though I do not like the methods and bureaucracy involved with architecture. 

I made the decision to become an architect when I was 10 years old. It has taken me 38 years to realize it might not have been the right decision. I don't regret becoming an architect, I have had some great experiences and learned some valuable things. I wonder what life would have been like if I had followed a more artistic path.

Now I wonder if it is too late?

I know it is never too late but I feel like I wasted many years and resources I had looking for a hobby.

Where do I go from here?

tangerine keeps me walking

A friend told me about potionfactory years ago. It wasn't something I needed then. I decided to try it out last summer when I found listening to podcasts while walking wasn't working out.

I like listening to podcasts but it doesn't help with my pace. It does help if the podcast is funny and I laugh while I walk. I get the walk and an ab workout at the same time. Never mind any funny looks I get from laughing by myself.

One of my favorite podcasts is All Songs Considered. The podcast is only weekly and I like listening to music while I walk. I find myself walking to the beat. If the song has a fast tempo, this is good. If the song has a slow tempo, it is not so good.

I downloaded the trial of Tangerine and got to work making a playlist. Some songs were too fast and some were too slow. I adjusted the requirements and found a list that made me walk faster but not too fast. There are several training samples such as interval training to help you get out of a rut and improve.

I like that I can add more rules to allow for only the songs I rated 3 stars or greater, and songs that haven't been played lately. When I come back from a walk, I move the songs that work the best for walking into another playlist called walkings faves.

I was falling behind in my podcasts so I went back to listening to them. There are some podcasts which offend my dad. But when I found myself slowing down again and I decided to try it again.

I have been using Tangerine again for a few weeks now. I have find that my average pace has increased. This is mostly because of intervals. One morning my playlist started with a fast song. I wasn't quite ready for it but found the pace and stuck with it. I know that the body prefers to be at stasis. Especially mine. Walking at the same pace will get easier and results will wane. Intervals make the body react and do more work and improve.

Listening to music lets my mind wander and I find myself thinking of the eclectic selection of songs. I use shuffle so I never know what song will be next. Some of these songs, I don't remember ever hearing let alone buying.

Say You Love Me Fleetwood Mac Greatest Hits
Crystalised The xx Crystalised
C'mon Guster Ganging Up On the Sun Rock
Mercy Matt Nathanson Modern Love
Taste the Summer Duran Duran Astronaut
Paperback Head Tegan and Sara Sainthood
Water In The Well Spirit Of The West Save This House
Postage Stamp World Rogue Wave Out of the Shadow

I don't know who Matt Nathanson is. Was this a free song I never listened to? Taste the Summer is something that I usually skip but the beat works well for walking. Paperback Head is a little difficult to find the right rhythm. Artists make sone for interest, not for walking. Water in the Well? I have 3 albums from Spirit of the West that I got in the 1990's. I don't think I have listened to them since I ripped the CDs into iTunes.

Love Song Sara Bareilles Love Song
Rollin' And Tumblin' Eric Clapton Unplugged
Perfectly Good Guitar John Hiatt Perfectly Good Guitar
Summer Sunshine The Corrs Borrowed Heaven
Wouldn't It Be Nice (Stereo Mix) The Beach Boys Pet Sounds
You Will Pay Tomorrow Terence Trent D'Arby Neither Fish Nor Flesh
Outrageous Paul Simon Surprise
Let's Stick Together Bryan Ferry & Roxy Music Street Life

Tangerine is really working for me this time. My walks are getting better and I am listening to more of my music.

picky eaters & other quirks

My boys are picky eaters. This is typical with kids with autism. It is one of those things that you learn to work around. The boys were good eaters until the toddler years. All kids go through that. My kids never stopped. In some ways they have gotten worse. 

I understand some of their issues. I am a picky eater too. I do not like steak but I love hamburgers. It is a texture thing. I love tomatoes but hate ketchup. I don't dip fries into ketchup. My boys never learned to dip.  But I know when I have to give in. I once at ate chicken livers when I was in Poland. We hadn't had a decent meal in a couple of days and were out of options. Kids with autism will not give in. They will starve before they give in. 

Some of their food routines... 

Breakfast

Last year, I used to fix Lenders Cinnamon Raisin bagels. I toasted 4 bagels. Andy ate them all. Maybe once a month, Ryan ate 1/2 bagel. On school days, Andy didn't eat much before he left. But he would eat the leftovers when he gets home. They were cold and stale and he would eat them. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I fixed the leftover sausage from Sunday. I used to fix biscuits but Andy stopped eating them so then I just toasted a couple of bagels to go along with the sausage. Andy would eat the sausage but skip the bagels until he got home. 

Then Andy started high school. School starts at 7:30. He has to get up at 6 and catch the bus at 6:50. Andy is not a morning person. He would eat his sausage on Tuesdays and Thursdays but nothing the other days. Andy's lunch doesn't begin until 12:10. It is a long time to go without food. I asked Andy if he would eat sausage if I made every week day. He was excited with that idea. Monday and Tuesday, Andy eats the leftovers from Sundays. I cook up a fresh batch on Wednesday and Andy eats that the next three days. On Saturdays, Andy eats 4 toasted bagels. It takes him all morning the way he grazes. 

On Sundays, we have waffles and sausage. Andy eats 2 waffles and 5 sausages. It is routine. He cannot deviate, unless he is sick.

Ryan usually eats cookies or donut holes. And chocolate milk. Lots of chocolate milk. Ryan will nibble the edges of the cold, plain waffles but nothing else. 

Lunch

At home I fix grilled cheese. Only Andy will eat this. Years ago, when Ryan ate as well, he used to leave the crust. Andy picked up this habit and won't stop. 

When we go out to eat, we do drive thru through two different places. Andy prefers Chick-Fil-A chicken nuggets and fries. Ryan will only eat fries from McDonald's. We stop at McDonald's first where Ryan gets medium fries and Andy gets small fries. Then we go to Chick-Fil-A. For years, Ryan's preference was Wendy's until they switched their fries. And there was a time when Ryan preferred Arby's home style fries until they stopped carrying them. Chick-Fil-A is closed on Sundays so Andy used to hot dogs until he got tired of them. He started eating McDonald's chicken selects until they stopped making the Chicken Selects. I make grilled cheese for Andy. One Sunday, I stopped at Target and got a Pizza Hut Personal Pan Pizza for Andy. He really liked that. But I cannot stop there each week. I told him I will get him pizza every other week. He is OK with that. 

Lunch at School

For Andy's lunch: 1/2 cup Multi-Grain Cheerios, 5 club crackers, 1 cup Whole Grain Goldfish crackers. He usually eats the Goldfish and the cereal, the Club crackers are eaten last. He drinks a thermos os Juicy Juice.

For Ryan's lunch: 1/2 cup Chocolate Cheerios, 5 Club Crackers. He always eats the crackers and about 1/3 of the Cheerios. Ryan drink Capri Sun. It is the only time he will drink juice.

Dinner

Andy eats Tyson Southern Style Chicken Nuggets. Every night. Nothing else. Sometimes Ryan will eat one nugget. Most days, Andy eats the whole box. We rarely eat out for dinner.

Snacks

Ryan eats his cookies and donut holes and chocolate milk. Ryan does not differentiate from snack and meal. Ryan is my chocolate boy. He used to eat plain Hershey Kisses. I had gotten a bag of Dark Chocolate Kisses for me. I noticed the bag on the floor, empty. He ate the whole thing and did not get sick! We moved to caramel kisses and kept them in the refrigerator. I used to keep them on a high shelf then Ryan got tall and smart. I cannot find these locally anymore. I have to go to another Target.  

Andy will eat Entenmann's Pop'Ems if he is hungry between meals. Or Club Crackers. 

Special Meals

Andy likes pizza. He prefers Papa John's thin crust with cheese only. Andy will eat half of a large pizza. He will not eat leftover pizza. Ryan has not eaten pizza since he was 5 years old. 

Foods they used to eat

Chips: Ryan used to bring home snack bags of chips. He got them from his teacher for being good. He used to eat them. He preferred the rippled kind. Then he stopped eating them. Andy used to love Pringles in his lunch but he stopped eating them. 

Cookies: Ryan has always been my sweet eater. And he would try different cookies. Especially if he picked them out at the grocery store. He loved Oreo Uh-ohs. He liked chocolate chip cookies. He even tried Keebler Fudge Stripe cookies. He won't eat any of these anymore.

Candy: Andy has never liked candy. His teacher used to use it for rewards. Some kids used to try to sneak it. She started putting it by Andy because he wouldn't eat it not would he let the other kids eat it. Ryan used to use m&m's. He is the only kid who got messy eating them.

Packaging

The boys don't like change. 

Manufacturers love to change the design of the packages. This was always a problem. I had to show the kids it was the same and they were OK. Mostly. Then Keebler changed the cookie! Andy used to eat EL Fudge cookies. The front of the cookie is the front of the elf. The back of the cookie, was the back of the elf. Then they changed the back to some words. Andy would not eat them anymore.

Other Quirks

Ryan does not like to sit inside restaurants. The exception is  McDonald's at DisneyWorld where they show old Disney cartoons. Andy likes to eat inside. We eat inside when Ryan is not with us. 

tools

I think the thing that really got me to start writing in my journals again is listening to podcasts and reading blogs about pens and paper. I love pens and paper. I have always been drawn to stationary stores and even their small sections in larger stores. I would go to the neighborhood drug store not to buy snacks or comic books but to gaze at the pens, pencils and other tools available on the 6 foot length of aisle. My first shoplifting was a 6" ruler. Who steals a ruler?

I know that tools don't matter. I have heard the arguments of photographers and their cameras. It is how you wield the weapon is what results you can expect. But I still listen to the Pen Addict Podcast and look at what new pen or journal they are talking about. Many pen aficionados talk about fountain pens. I had one once. I bought it because I liked the design of the pen. It was from Shaeffer and had a jungle scene with a lion and a rainbow. I was a tween, of course I love rainbows. This pen used disposable cartridges of ink. I don't remember anything about the writing experience.

I understand that using a fountain pen can be a wonderful experience. But I also know they need to be maintained. I grumble when I have to change the refill on my roller ball pen, I do not want to think about ink, eye droppers and cleaning nibs. My years in architecture have taught me that cleaning pens is a hassle and not worth the effort. Yes, I know cleaning fountain pens is much easier than cleaning drafting pens with their minuscule needles, but I just want to get the writing done with minimal effort. I use mechanical pencils so I don't have to stop and sharpen them.

Regarding paper, my first journals were purchased because of the cloth covers. I just liked the way they looked. The paper didn't matter to me. When I moved to a digital planner, I no longer had extra pages for journaling and I jumped on the Moleskine bandwagon. I like the look of the books and the paper is once to write on. I have purchased a number of Field Notes but am not a collector. I am not a [Field Addict] (http://www.70decibels.com/thepenaddict/2013/4/23/episode-51-the-things-that-people-love-the-most-are-wrong.html). They are good to have when you need to write something quickly and don't take up a lot of space in your bag. I had purchased a Rhodia notebook back in 2011. I started using it again and love the dotted grid. If Moleskine had a dotted grid, I would not switch. The Rhodia covers feel like buttery smooth leather and the paper is a dream to write on. They are not ubiquitous like Moleskine so they are not as cheap.

Will a better pen or a better notebook make me a better writer? No, but I might enjoy the process more and therefore write more. Like some bloggers prefer a clicky keyboard, I love the feel of smooth paper and pens that glide without effort. Only writing a lot will make me a better writer.

computer less. the last day

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I was getting pretty antsy to get back to my computer. I thought about cleaning my desk but never got around to it. I did vacuum to large dust bunnies last week. Even with the computer to distract me, there is plenty for me to do other than what I should do.

I was waiting all day for the call. Dinner came and went. I got an email after 6 telling me that my computer was ready. An email? Sure, OK.

I asked Ryan if I should go since he is almost as anxious for me to get the computer back. “What time will you get home?” I thought I should be back by 7:30. He said OK and I left. I had to wait about 5 minutes for someone to help. They are always busy at the apple store. I was back home at 7:37.

I loaded up my extra ram and booted the iMac. I was expecting a generic computer but they managed to put almost everything on the new drive. I quickly connected all my hard drives and started syncing my iPad. I got a message that I needed to authorize iTunes, so I entered in my password. Only to have another dialogue box say that this computer is already authorized. Silly computer.

I backed and synced the devices and some other maintenance. SuperDuper! is running its backup. And CrashPlan is figuring out what is different as well. Happy.

computer less day 6

I didn't miss my computer much today. I don't use it too much on Sundays. Once my POTD is posted, I rarely go back until eyeing when I plug in my devices.

The stuff I will need to do is piling up. But without a job I will have plenty of time to get it done.

computer less day 5

Ryan was upset that we still don't have the computer back. "I'll never be allowed to sync.” I offered to set up iTunes on his computer using my back up drives. “But that will take too long.” Actually, it won't take long if I just use my boot drive. But he doesn't want me to use his computer. Today he is learning patience. Next we will work on compromise and sharing.

catch up

Saturday is the day I catch up on some computer tasks. I download Year of Icons for the week. I add the week’s worth of photo of the day to the monthly layout. I make a digital card to add to be printed folder.

web transactions

One of my domains was due for renewal. It is registered at NameCheap. I went to 1Password to renew it. I logged in OK but each time I click to renew, I got sent back to login. I went to Safari and logged in. It worked this time and I got to the checkout screen. I chose PayPal knowing it would be less fields to fill in.

blogging

The same problems occur with the SquareSpace app. The iPhone app does not have the option to flip to Markdown. I wanted to try to fix it using the web app but cannot login using cut and paste. I will not enter the long password manually. My bank is the same way. Why do these sites make it more difficult to use safer passwords?

computer less day 4

I did not have missed my computer too much today. I went to the high school to help celebrate Andy's birthday. I was supposed to have his IEP meeting today but his teacher had to postpone.

But I did miss my computer when I tried to post to my blog. SquareSpace app is rough. It crashes on my iPad 1 when I try to save or post to the website or refresh the post list. And adding a photo will only put it at the end no matter if you add it before the text. I ended up using both iPad and iPhone apps to get a short post posted.

I got a phone call from Apple while I was on my way to the school. But it was only a tease. They were calling to let me know it would not be finished today. Oh well, I didn't expect it even though the email said 3-5 days.

The rest of the day went well and I easily used my iPad and iPhone. Well, except for when my iPhone got stuck in Camera mode and I couldn't reset it. I realized I couldn't even restore without my computer. But I got home and took my time and got it to Hard Reset. All was well.

computer less day 3

I am finding it easier to be without a computer only because I know I will have mine back in a few days.

Because I knew I couldn't upload my photo of the day, I didn't even take the shot until 5 pm.

Today I miss being able to order online easily. I use 1Password and it is simple to fill in logins, passwords and credit card information when using a computer. 1Password is available on the iPhone and iPad, but it is not as easy to fill in some of the information. I went to JetPens and found that password field would not accept a copy and paste. My passwords are not easy to remember which is the point of 1Password and I sure didn't want to try to remember that 12 hexadecimal password. Or better yet, write it down so I could type it again into the password field. But I found that if I used the link to JetPens from 1Password, it filled in the information when it got to the page. But how will it work with credit card information?

computer less day 2

There are so many little ways I miss my computer.

music playlists

While I walk, I listen to songs which Tangerine chose for my pace. Tangerine isn't perfect so I rate songs that work well for walking and those that don't. Some don't work at all and I skip them. When I get back home, I look at my walking playlist and remove those with low ratings or skips. While walking this morning, a song came up on shuffle and I didn't like it for walking. I skipped it to go to the next song. I realized that I would not be able to take that out of my walking playlist. Well, I could remove it from my iPhone but what happens when I sync?

tv episodes

I watch TV episodes on my iPad. I purchase episodes through iTunes on my computer and download them there then sync to my iPad. I only keep current seasons that I am watching. On my iPad, I only keep the latest unwatched episode. Two of my current favorite shows are Bones and Castle which air on Mondays. I wasn't able to get the new shows before the computer problems. I decided to try to download to my iPad using wifi. It is a slow process and my iPad 1 tends to crash while in iTunes app.

rss

I use Reeder on my computer and iPad and sometimes on my iPhone. I subscribe to too many feeds. In the morning, the unread count is high and I can go through a lot of feeds quicker on my computer using keyboard shortcuts. Using the iPad is OK but slower.

tumblr

I love to look through tumblr and if I have away for a while, it is best to use the computer. Again, keyboard shortcuts are key. The tumblr app is OK but I miss being able to click on link in another tab. If I go out to safari, then go back to tumblr, it takes me back to the top of the dashboard. It is annoying having the scroll through all the read posts. Tumblr app on my iPad 1 will crash if I try to move it along too quickly.

watching Internet videos

Some videos are just not compatible with iOS. And some are too long or are slow to load. With those I save them to Instapaper to view on my computer. I will have a bunch to view next week. And many will no longer be timely.